Falling Apart Is Inconvenient
Aug. 31st, 2008 06:39 pmI wish I were by nature a calm and easy-going person who didn't have a panic attack every time things didn't go as planned. I get things very set in my mind and I hate change. When I'm anticipating something and a turn for the worse happens, I mentally and emotionally collapse. I can't handle the situation and I just want to thrust the situation into other people's hands so they can deal with it. I can be patient, I can be hardworking, but when my solid foundation has a crack in it I feel the whole building of myself and my world is collapsing. I obsess, I cry, I stay in bed, I run away until action can be taken, I fall to pieces. I wish this were something I outgrew. Maybe eventually this is an issue I will overcome but so far it's something that still plays a huge part in how I live my life (adding to my anxiety) and still causing me all kinds of practical problems.