Meaning of Life for Me

In Authentic Happiness it mentioned the importance of having a meaning to your life. Sometimes in bipolar episodes I would dwell a lot on my life purpose and whether I could even justify continuing to live at the expense of other living things. Sometimes I thought that maybe there was a trick to being alive and we were all meant to kill ourselves so we would no longer kill other things in order to exist. I'd also obsess over what choice I made would benefit the most other living beings (including micro-organisms). However, I generally maintained the outlook that the world was an enchanting place that was primarily good and human beings were also fascinating and primarily good. I never really felt hopeless to affect people and the world in positive ways, though I would be keenly aware of the times I had negative impacts.

Usually, though, I have had a feeling of meaning in life and my idea of that hasn't changed much. Around age 12 I became more aware of other living creatures and how I didn't want to hurt them and wanted to do good. For me the purpose in life is to help other living beings as much as you can while also enjoying your life and finding happiness and hope in whatever you can. The world is a good place with many tools you can use to improve circumstances for yourself and others. Kindness and mercy are of the utmost importance. Forgiveness should always be cultivated -- though it took awhile to see that forgiveness didn't have to mean having abusive people in your life. Being grateful and aware of how much others sacrifice for you was also always important. Also I've always believed in God and prayed to God, though I see God as everywhere and largely beyond comprehension. For me God was always intimately tied to my beliefs about meaning in life. I want to experience God as purely and openly as possible and allow love to fill my life. I equate God with love and love in the world is of the utmost importance to me. I want to feel as much love as I can and to spread love to others and reassure living things that they are loved and appreciated. Life is difficult and filled with many roadblocks, but being able to see the good in life and fill yourself with love and happiness, contributing to the love and happiness of as many beings as possible and in as much depth as possible, makes living purposeful and worthwhile even in the darkest times.

15 Influential Authors

Another list! This time, list fifteen authors (poets included) who've influenced you and that will always stick with you. List the first fifteen you can recall in no more than fifteen minutes. Tag at least fifteen friends, including me, because I'm interested in seeing what authors my friends choose. (To do this, go to your Notes tab on your profile page, paste rules in a new note, cast your fifteen picks, and tag people in the note.)

1. Madeleine L'Engle (I love her fantastical/sci-fi elements in many of her books and I love her style of Christianity and philosophy)
2. Fyodor Dostoyevsky (I identify with a lot of his characters and their inner turmoil and development)
3. Philip Pullman (His Dark Materials are some of my favorite books and even though his books are more atheist in tone, I related to a lot of the underlying feelings of the characters and what drives them)
4. Peter Beagle (The Last Unicorn -- Need I say more?)
5. Lloyd Alexander (I've been entranced by his Prydain Chronicles since I first read them in middle school and had some spiritual experiences inspired by them and developed a greater interest in Celtic/Welsh mythology)
6. Emily Dickinson (I identify with her lifestyle and her poems really affect me)
7 Soren Kierkegaard (I identify with a lot of his beliefs and philosophy and feel inspired by them)
8. C.S. Lewis (I also identify with a lot of his spiritual quest and beliefs)
9. Jane Mendelsohn (The book Innocence inspired how I want to write books and I identified a lot with the protagonist's tribulations -- albeit, at a later age)
10. Neil Gaiman (One of my favorite authors and author of my favorite book -- Stardust)
11. Angela Carter (I love dark fairy tale retellings)
12. Carl Jung (his psychology and philosophizing I really relate to and feel applies to me)
13. Joseph Campbell (I love studying archetypes and stories)
14. William Blake (I am inspired by his spiritual experiences, the beauty of his words, and his equally beautiful art)
15. Marie-Louis Von Franz (a Jungian psychologist who writes a lot about archetypes in fairy tales -- one of my favorite topics to read about since I was about 14-15 years old)

Edit: Okay, I forgot two of my favorite writers and have to include them:P

16. Haruki Murakami (I love his writing style and relate to the weird side characters)
17. Philip K. Dick (VALIS and its sequels really affected me and my thinking)

15 Influential Films

This is also from Facebook, but I want to post it here, too:-)

1. The Fountain
2. Enchanted
3. Ever After
4. Pulp Fiction
5. Harold and Kumar Go to White Castle (Yes, I know that's sad, but it really lifts my spirits and calms my anxiety)
6. The Last Unicorn
7. Lost in Translation
8. Disney's Beauty and the Beast
9. The Company of Wolves
10. The Sweet Hereafter
11. Tale of Two Sisters
12. Labyrinth
13. The Princess Bride
14. Best in Show
15. Persona

5 Gratitudes

1. Reading more of Authentic Happiness
2. Watching Pride and Prejudice and Who's the Boss?
3. Getting along with my mother and having some of my anxiety lifted
4. Most of my laundry being okay despite the fact that I washed dark blue jeans with white clothes:P One shirt has a bit of a stain on it, but I will still wear it.
5. My cats giving me lots of affection.